A Short Trip Back in 2013

**THIS POST IS TAKEN FROM JOURNEYWITHMEL.BLOGSPOT - It was a blog I started the beginning of 2013. Since, I have forgotten the email/password combo used to access this account. I am grateful to have still remembered the actual web address tho. New Posts COMING SOON!


Feb 3, 2013
Lights, Camera, Filters, Effects...Action!

Good morning! In bed after calling out of work today. Feels good to relax! There is a perk... it IS Superbowl Sunday!!! May the best team win! Ravens vs. 49ers! B...as in Bey...as in Beyoncé is set for halftime show. A good day!


Well, I decided to blog today because I wanted to address the truth behind pictures, my pictures and these "effects" that a lot of cameras have. Living in a world of commercials, glamour, photoshop, re-touching...it's hard for an amateur to really distinguish the difference between what is real and what has been altered.


Example: A comment was left on a picture I posted of my cousin and I taken yesterday. Something like..."Mel, you photo well. It must be the flash." (WAS THAT SHADE?! I'll let it pass LOL!). I explained, after thanking her for the comment/compliment, that there was no flash involved. Great lighting and enhancements from an effect on Instagram were used though.


That comment got me to thinking about myself, people/friends that have used the filters, people I've seen pictures of and then have met in person and the people that live through social media sites through these effects and enhancements. Understand that more times than others when you see these people in person...they WILL NOT look like their IG photos, Facebook or Twitter photos.


Take myself, my looks are what they are. The way I smile and my eyes are my best features in my opinion. Skin tones and angles (which alters the way the fat shifts as well) will change based on lighting (where the light hits you) and the angle of the camera. That is a fact. That is something I've learned over time and damn near mastered to produce the best pictures taken of me. Now, strip me of moisturizer, put me in a room w/ bad lighting- NOT even "bad lighting" but the sunlight that lights up your room with the blinds closed type of light and i DO NOT look like my pictures. How do I look?
You be the judge. But I think I look like Mel as you would see me in person. And that is ok w/ me! I think sometimes people get too wrapped up w/ these filters and lose touch of how they really look.


Then there are younger people trying to imitate and emulate something that is NOT completely true. That becomes a problem.


*sips wine* (it is now NOON - who's judging?!)


That said, Yes I'm gonna angle, find great lighting and use photo enhancements when I damn well please. Do understand that I am in that number of being aware and knowing the difference that of all these beautiful people you see through pictures, in person, most of them are an altered version of that picture and THAT is how they look.


I hope I didn't step on too many toes. If you know me, I'll attempt to care less if I did.
And to my friends that DO know the difference..please share this with those who DO NOT. You know who they are!


**The purpose for this post is to really have us all take a step back and look in the mirror and say, "That is me right there!" Take away the makeup, the morning facial routines, the camera effects, the "best" lighting...everything...and that is YOU.**


I love myself and the way I look WITH AND WITHOUT the touch ups.


Ps: I think y'all are beautiful and handsome with and without too!

Jan 12, 2013
Cheers! I see you...

Too often, we as individuals do not take the time to acknowledge one another; whether it be a simple "Hi" or "Hope all is well". In this case, I'm speaking directly to everyone I know, don't know, or maybe have only heard about in social settings. Whether we've come from the same hometown, high school or.college, thanks to social media, social outings, networking etc, EVERYONE has heard your name, seen your work, know that you have things in the making, have seen your triumphs, seen some set backs, even some failures - and that TOO is ok! The point is, as most of us begin to enter into our mid-20s, we're all working hard! I know for a fact, I haven't been able to go to every party- if any, buy your mixtapes, come to your fashion shows, congratulate you after your countless auditions, see the movies you've been apart of-the list goes on! Fact is, like you, I'm out here making my own lane too. And since I'm only able to observe from my current location, I just wanted to say Congratulations on EVERYTHING! I know at times, it gets hard, but I see y'all, putting in the work, working overtime because you believe in yourselves-- and that is beautiful and worth being acknowledged!


So to all my...friends...promoters, producers, businessmen/women, singers, rappers, songwriters, doctors, therapists, models, teachers, college graduates, grad students, fashion designers, actors/actresses/directors, computer engineers, athletes - AGAIN, the list goes on........CHEERS! I see you!
M

Jan 3 2013
It was written...

Ever been so sure of something? That is how I feel about music and my place as a songwriter. Nevermind the fact I wrote my first song at age 8 or that I'll be 25 this year which means I've been writing for 17yrs. The fact is, in this life  thus far, if there is one thing I'm confident in, it is my ability to write a song.

One could only imagine how much one could have improved over 17 years of writing. As I enter this next chapter of my life, now, more than ever, my music needs to be heard! It deserves to be heard.
I hear so much noise on the radio at times. I miss the essence of good music. I miss R and B...which happens to be my favorite genre. Favorite or not, I can write it all because I have an appreciation for MUSIC!

Lately, I've been seeing glimpses of a genre "comeback". Melanie, Tamar and Brandy just to name a few...singers who can sing...lyrics with meaning...music composed beautifully. What young, up-and-coming songwriters aren't inspired?

I'm excited! Over the years, I've come across talented individuals: ALL GENRES. Music and the music industry are about to receive a makeover. Rappers are writing their memoirs, singers are SINGING, songwriters are storytelling and composers and producers are shaping the soundtrack to this next generation. I love music. I live for music.

M

Jan 1, 2013

Happy New Year 2013!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

I hope all resolutions have been made. Prayers have been sealed with "Amen." A new year to try and do things the right way, a different way, any way out of no way...! Anything you have every wanted to do, work towards getting it accomplished this year! Have faith and confidence!

That said, WELCOME TO MY BLOG!!! (yeah...the old one is now...I'm unsure...but HERE is where you need to be!)

It's me, Mel! I'm so excited and READY for this year! I have so many projects on the horizon and I cannot wait to share them with you all. Stay tuned! This will be an interesting ride.
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For the love of music and God,

M.

Once Upon a Friendship...

Friend or Foe...or... it's all becoming a little blurry on who's who these days. Foes are disguised as friends. Friends are indeed foes. You almost feel completely comfortable with strangers and associates. Funny right? How do you define a friend? I used to believe a friend was someone I shared things in common with, an unspoken trust and sworn secrecy, love and respect beyond measure and a bond unbreakable. Lately, and by lately I mean within the past year, I cannot seem to find that to be true...well, at least not all the time...with every "friend".


Allow me to start off saying that when I  call you my friend, I have every intention of this being a lifelong commitment. Friendships are one of the best natural events that take place as a result of simply being born and I take them very seriously and never for granted. While I do value friendships with such high regard, I do know that life happens and yes there are some deal breakers...but even deal breakers deserve an explanation...or at least some sort of conclusion...


I wish I could name everyone I have ever called a "friend". But I can't. That's my fault for using that word so loosely. It has gotten better as I have gotten older. Now the problem is the "friends" have gotten PhD's in Disguising. Foe...or...?... I don't know. And I'm left not knowing because the opposite of "friend" doesn't necessarily mean "foe"...it could mean.......I don't know, but if I had a word for it, that's what it would be. 


I won't say that I'm always the best friend a person could have, but I try my best. I'm far from perfect and I mess up sometimes. I do find truth and comfort in knowing that I am loyal, dependable, a great listener and when I dedicate myself to a friendship, or call someone a friend, I mean it. Through thick and thin. To hell and back again. For the lowest of the lows to the highest of the highs, my intentions are good and my heart is pure and I will always stay true to that friend...and the relationship. But I don't always find that in return. 


This year alone two of my "friendships" have ended. Different reasons-and I won't go into detail about either- but at the end of the day I am forced to look at the common denominator, me. What could I have said/done differently? Maybe if I would've...Maybe I could've...I guess I should've... Well, if I think like that, I probably wouldn't be true to who I am...or what I believe in and what I stand for... *Follow me because, I don't want anyone to think that I'm being hypocritical or "above anyone or any situation" about me going against my "what if's" because as stated before, I'm not perfect, so I do realize I have faults and I can admit to them but the reason why I say I wouldn't be true to who I am is because...


...whatever it was that I said or did...especially in that moment, whether an argument or disagreement, whatever...I meant it. How the friend was affected by it and could we have talked about it/gotten through it? Well...initially both situations were never discussed. Which is where my dilemma comes in. Since when aren't "friends" able to talk out their issues? Granted, one of those situations has since been discussed and we both agreed it was best we kept moving in separate directions (which I can respect and intend to remain cordial if/when ever face to face again). But an abrupt end to a friendship leaves me uneasy. A lot of unanswered questions and really I reflect on how true the "friendship" was. I'm now kinda left to draw my own conclusions and make peace within myself and move on...and when I move on...that is exactly what I do. 


So now I'm here...fresh off the second of the two "friendships" ending. Making peace with myself and the situation for what it is. And moving on. It's unfortunate because I pride myself on having the best friends...and in reality, I know I do have the best friends...because they're still around. I don't know, maybe I have too much faith in friends, too high of standards and expectations... (although, I don't think I ask for much--NOR do I expect anything more from a friend than I am willing to give). To be straightforward, I just hate losing friends. Especially  when I've invested so much of myself into it. But I guess that's the way it goes sometimes. 


Just as loyal as I am to a friendship, I behave the exact same in regard to moving past a situation. I would never speak negative or shed light on the past. I have no future comments or opinions on them-their name or likeness-not my style. It is a chapter that has ended and for everything it was worth, I got something useful from it. 


God is love. Love is family + friends.

Mel

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! 24 years ago today @ 9:24am, I, Melvin Montá Lassiter was born! What can I say? Is 24 years suppose to feel like a lifetime? It doesn't. I still feel like I did 5-6-10 years ago...well sort of. I fell down the other day and let me tell you....yeah....you can just imagine! Lol! 


Blessed! That is how I sum up life, from Monday, March 28, 1988 up until now, Wednesday, March 28, 2012. Of course, like anyone, I could sit and point out my hits and misses and should've, could've, would've thus far...but hell, there are plenty more hits and misses to come so I might as well wait right?!


I've am blessed to have family and friends whom I love so much. They've made 24 years interesting. Not too easy...I've been able to make mistakes and learn and grow from them. They've allowed me to become a man and independent and I am grateful for that because here I stand at 24; I have a job, my own apartment, a car (although that b!@#$ is taking me through...LOL...) and I just feel as though I've been able to gradually embrace and mature into adulthood. I have the best foundation a man could ask for.


...I have the best family..my mom, I absolutely adore her. She's the epitome of strength. Loyalty. Love. Friendship. Life pretty much. A great deal of why I am who I am today. My sisters...even my dad...although we're not extremely close, I see so much of him in myself the older I get. I think I really strike the balance between my parents. Lol.. My grandparents...everyone...through it all...thank you for the love and support. All my aunts, cousins, great aunts and cousins..etc...Thanks!


My friends that have been here for the past nearly 2o yrs(that's crazy) and in-between, y'all are my everything, and I appreciate growing and learning with you all!


So today, at this point in my life, I am happy. I am well with my character. I try to make the wisest decisions. I try not to judge others, and if I do, it comes from the best place..because I don't believe in judging other's mishaps, mistakes and choices-especially because I don't want people judging me.  I know myself a little better. I know what I like and don't like. There are some things that I have zero tolerance for...and that is okay. I do know that the older you get, the less you apologize for the things you stand for! Which brings me to my birthday wish...


My birthday wish is for people to be more accepting of others. Whether that be, beliefs, lifestyles, careers, backgrounds, social classes...anything that would separate you from the next person, and cause you to judge or belittle them...FIND that medium. Find the common denominator that connects you to that person-1. the fact that you're a human being 2. that they have feelings just like you 3. understanding that you're a few decisions away from being THAT person- ...just learn to respect one another. That zero tolerance I spoke of...disrespect...oh man....(...I'll save that for a later post..)


...I speak like I've been here before right?...yeah I get told that a lot. "Old soul" is what they call it. Well..it is still the beginning of the year. So many possibilities and opportunities ahead. I'm optimistic... and quite spontaneous. I think that is the recipe that has gotten me this far. Can't wait to see what lies ahead... It's my birthday...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!


God is love. Love is family + friends.

Mel 

Relationships...Or Whatever U Call It

Hi guys and gals! Look! If your friends are as interesting as mine are, then you can relate. Also might I add before anyone wants to check the credibility, I am single. I have been single since April 2007..yes, that is almost 5 years. So what do I know? Probably not much. But I did grow up fast. I've grown a lot in five years. I was falling in love...hard, before many of y'all had discovered that there was a bird and a bee. So, I'm just speaking from 1. personal experience. 2. being the outsider looking in to some of my friend's decisions...


I guess...well I know this whole life thing is to be happy, fall in love, reproduce (...OR ADOPT...), raise a family, instill morals and values unto them...be happy, grow old and leave a legacy. Well...about that falling in love shit...ummmmmm! Let's talk. (PS. I DO NOT KNOW WHY I'M EVEN GIVING THIS LITTLE INSERT, BUT AS YOU KNOW MY FRIENDS RANGE ON A BROAD SPECTRUM...AND THEY LOVE WHO THEY LOVE-NO JUDGEMENT ZONE HERE. SO IF YOU JUDGING, THANKS FOR READING THUS FAR BUT THE EXIT BUTTON IS IN YOUR TOP RIGHT HAND CORNER. PEACE) 


So over the past few months, I have watched a friend fall for a guy, that I personally wasn't a "fan" of...thought he could do better than. Until recently, things seemed be going well. Needless to say, the motherf!@#$% started showing his ass! Now my friend, who is probably having a breakdown before our eyes, is all types of filled w/ mixed emotions. Still wants him, but won't put up with the disrespect and subliminals via social media sites. The guy, the love interest, obviously has a lot, and I DO MEAN A LOT of growing up to do. Very much still a dreamer and at the end of the day, isn't ready for commitment.


Second scenario. I have a friend that swears he's unattractive (in all honesty....LOL..naw jk, he's a decent looking kid) but he has an odd approach to females. Again he's decent looking, cool type of person but he doesn't attract the "right" type of girls. THEN, when he's approached by the "perfect" girl, he "fakes" on her because of others looking on. WTF right?! Yeah, he said the same thing as he explained the situation. Keep in mind, in my opinion, he kind of has a high standard for the type of female he is willing to spend time getting to know. Contrary to guy in the first scenario, who, in my opinion, has a very moderate standard and is willing to work with someone he sees potential in. Now, unlike friend from the first scenario, friend is second scenario is very much materialistic and is honest about it! I believe friend in first scenario wants a thug...when he deserves an equal. (NOT SAYING THUGS ARE LESS THAN, I DID NOT SAY THAT...)


So what do I have to say? Keeping with my "non judgment mantra"... LOL...


Before I continue, let me say that I do not want a relationship right now...especially a committed one! Meaning, someone to kick it with - IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE SEX, I've been without that for a looong time too, so NO, it's not about the sex...just the company - SURE...but the titles and labels, obligations, emotions, time, energy, money, EVERYTHING that comes along with being in a relationship of that magnitude..HELL NO! I am 23, I'll be 24 in a few days (March 28th) and I have things to do. I can't have anyone tagging along, holding me down or back...sorry.. None of that. I need to be able to GO. No questions asked. No answers needed. AND I feel as though a lot of guys and girls around my age don't need that either. Am I judging? NO. All I'm saying is be able to define yourself and have something to offer before feeling the need to "need"....or want a relationship. AND if you decide that you do want a relationship...OK, or NEED one, know the difference between a relationship and fuck buddy; be able to recognize your self worth. Be able to be honest and say, "I want a committed relationship" and comprehend exactly what that entails. It's hard work! I know that now..if I'd known that 10 yrs ago, I'd still be in THAT relationship. But it takes time before that epiphany happens.


So as far my final thoughts on friends 1 and 2...


For friend number 1, who's talented above and beyond, an artist much like myself, focus on your artistry. You ain't taking him anywhere he wants to be, so leave him where you found him. Besides...the disrespect is more than any of your friends can handle, and we're liable to....Anyways, you love hard I see and IF that is meant to be, it isn't right now. If it is in the cards, then it will happen. In the meantime, write, and open yourself up to someone who you don't have to work so hard for...you DESERVE it.


Friend number 2, ............... Stop cutting yourself short of the type of females you're willing to give the time of day to. You may find her somewhere in the pile of "basic" females you've ruled out. Piece of advice. The girl you're meant for will not care about Louis Vuitton, Hermes, or Christian Louboutin...well.......they would come third behind family and you. You feel me? Short, tall, chubby, skinny... you've got to have a balance somewhere. You're uber tall and skinny...and you look 11 years old. You're not quite the guy, EVERY WOMAN is looking for either..just putting it out there! HOWEVER, you're still young and you have T I M E! Focus on what you do...basketball...fashion...just continue working on building your character, finding what it is that you want besides a pretty face...and then...be sure have to something you've earned to offer.


I fell out of love some time in 2008. (I know..it took some time right? I mean, we did break up in April 2007...) but what I learned during and after that relationship is.. you have to know yourself, you have to be open enough and honest with yourself to have balance, patience, your own identity, and something to offer. Love hard...and fast...In my world, there is no other way to fall....but also I learned that more than anything, I was too young to settle down. Not talking marriage, just a relationship in general. After that relationship and the energy used during it, good and bad, I could have put that into something more fulfilling than a relationship at this stage in my life when I'm still growing. Ya feel me? Maybe you don't. Again, I'm not saying that this is for everyone, but it's been working for me...although....I do get horny for time to time...HAHAHAHAHA!


Thank you for reading!


PS. Any typos, I am not correcting right now. I'm slightly tired, I'll edit sometime later!


God is love. Love is family + friends.

Mel

Happy Valentine's Day

Oh you guys, It has been a while since my last post!!! I cannot begin to express how grateful I am for the feedback and love that I've gotten in response to this blog...Thanks, really...THANK YOU so much!


A few things have happened since my last post...Order of importance... 


Sadly, on January 18, 2012, I received news that my cousin Damon had suddenly passed away. Such a shock to my family. A "gentle giant" he indeed was. His charisma, his chuckle/laugh when he spoke...he will be missed. RIP Damon.
Being home for the services, I started to think. We always wish we were meeting up under different circumstances, yet, when the circumstances are more favorable, we have every excuse in the world, "I'm too busy," "I'm too tired," etc. Okay, so yes, there are genuine and legitimate reasons for absences....let's just say I took a long hard look at my itinerary. You have to MAKE the time. That's all it really comes down to. Thanks Damon.

Returning home, to my routine was quite shocking...in a good way. I was literally, returning H O M E-to MY apartment that I had just moved into the day before my cousin passed away. Let me tell you, turning that key and walking into my place was very liberating. It was a reassurance from God- I was doing SOMETHING right. Even now, as I write this blog, I look at how everything is slowly coming together. The bathroom set, the kitchen set, certain living room pieces I have my eyes on...I'm blessed. Thank you God.

That's where I am currently. I still love my job. I have friends there. My friends that I already had are still strong. My family is great. They're getting stronger and stronger. I had a chance to talk for a few hours with my oldest sister when I was home in January. I needed it. The love. The bond. The laughter. Life is pretty good...NOT perfect, but damn good. *smile*

In honor and in celebrating the life, the legacy and the music of Whitney Houston, I send love to everyone. To those for me, and against me. To those who have come and gone and are yet to come...and yet to go. I send love to y'all because, it is because of every single one of you that I am who I am..in so many ways. Through every encounter whether brief or long, I was able to take something away to better myself-to live the best life that I can live. And since I'm currently living this life, SINGLE....

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, I NEED A VALENTINE, SO I INVITE YOU ALL TO BE MY VALENTINE!!! XOXOXO

In memory of...
Damon D. Drewrey
5.5.73 - 1.18.12


Whitney Houston
8.9.63 - 2.11.12


OH BEFORE I FORGET, BE SURE TO CHECK OUT MY COUSIN BRITTANY'S BLOG --> Me As I See <-- I ABSOLUTELY F**KIN LOVE IT!


God(please forgive the f-bomb above) is love. Love is family + friends.

Mel

Happy 2012!!!

Happy New Year!!!!!


It's 2012!!! Welcome to the New Year everyone! This holiday season was what it was suppose to be. What does that mean? It means that I have no complaints. Christmas was spent w/ family and friends. New Year's Eve was spent w/ friends. New Year's Day, I had to work...and as expected, New Year's Night, was spent sleeping and resting! Simple yet ideal. What more could a guy ask for?


My spirit is full of joy. My health is cool, I'm a bit overweight, but I'm working on that. I'm happy. I'm in a very good space.  I have great friends. Great family. I have a great job. I've discovered again what makes me happy...


I'm getting back to my music, songwriting. I wrote my first song when I was eight years old. I've written countless songs over the past 15 years -I cannot wait to dive head first into my music again this year. New adventures w/ Myles Spencer, Kellita Wooten and more!!! So exciting!!! I cannot wait. I cannot give too much away, but a lot of great things happening in 2012!


As I think back on last year, it was not a bad year. I graduated from college. I did not move back home. New friends came along. I really do not think I lost any friends...well....there was that one...but that's where? ALL THE WAYYY BACK THERE! The second half of the year, brought me to 106 & Park to meet Kimora. This blog (which is one of the most proudest creations of mine). A new job. Ups and (a few) downs and here I stand. That's a testimony to myself. Realizing what I'm able to achieve when I put my mind to it.


With that said, my new year's resolutions are as follows:
1. To keep my happiness.
2. Secure an apartment.
3. Keep my job.
4. Explore my songwriting (jazz, rnb, rock, country etc...)
5. Continue building my brand.
6. Exploring new avenues.
7. BEING THE BEST ME THAT I CAN BE.  


My advice for my readers and the general public for this new year...Be unafraid to be YOU! Stop chasing your dreams and grab them! Make your dreams your reality. Stop living YOUR life through people you see on television. Make the life you live as fabulous, fun-filled and fulfilled as possible by what you have and what you are able to achieve. Put yourself first. Find your center. Secure your happiness. Then do good unto others. It comes back! That's the good life.


Love all y'all for the support! Be blessed this new year!


Ps. I've said it before, I love talking to people. If ever you're not feeling at your best-in need of a little "pick me up," pick up your phone and call me. If nothing more, I'm an ear to listen.  


God is love. Love is family + friends.

Mel

My Center-Uninterrupted!

It's been three weeks since my last post.  Lately, I haven't really had much to write about to be honest. I've been working {still loving the new gig}, relaxing, planning my next moves and finding my center. A few weeks ago, I had a conversation w/ my friend's boyfriend, Asa. It was great chatting with him! What started out as a routine "How are you?," ended up being an in depth, therapeutic  conversation about...ME! Sounds a bit cocky/conceited right? NO! I am NEVER one to talk about myself. But it damn sure felt good to be asked about MYSELF for once, opposed to being the one always doing the asking. For once, I was able to express myself, my goals, dreams and aspirations...uninterrupted, with someone genuinely interested. Thanks Asa!


After that conversation, I feel like my vision was a lot less blurred-because it was recognized by someone else. Validation. Oprah talked about it in her "Farewell" show. Validating someone. Simply recognizing/acknowledging someone or something that someone is doing. Was I searching for validation? No, obviously though, subconsciously I had longed for it. That conversation opened a new door for me. 


Finding my center was more than coming to a happy place within myself, but it was validating others around me and bringing them along to that happy place with me. Let me tell you-what a great feeling it is. It's a happiness and peace that only comes from within.


Try it...


...Well, yesterday was Christmas! {I'm writing this blog at 2am on 12/27 but I'm still in a 12/26 state of mind} Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone! I enjoyed my day very much! Fuchsia was along for the ride again. Spent time w/ JaNisa and got to see my bff Tara. Wine, food and more wine was how I spent my Christmas holiday. You really learn the true meaning of Christmas when you're 23! Ha! But seriously, it was definitely about the love and relaxing this season. Much fun. 


I think that about catches y'all up. I hope y'all take something from this and put it to good use. I'll check in with y'all in a few days! Thanks for reading.


Ps. I'm not a "taker". I didn't just "take" from that conversation w/ Asa. He, too, discussed a few things he had in the works and of course, existing in this networking society, there may be a few projects we'll collaborate on. Stay tuned...


God is love. Love is family + friends.

Mel